Fat Bubble: Style is Style
Welcome to the Fat Bubble, where we celebrate and lift up all things fat, building the representation we deserve, one step at a time!Â
Today, I want to share one of my very favourite Instagram accounts, Style Is Style. Lydia Okello is a fat enby model and writer, from Canada, and they consistently share a style and looks that I find really exciting and interesting!Â
Bethany and I spoke about this in our convo just before Christmas, but developing a personal sense of style is not always something that is easy for fat folks. I have classic memories of being a teenager, unable to wear the same cord flares and fitted tee look as the rest of my Britpop-loving pals, because I just couldn't access them in my size. At uni, I remember feeling really formal in comparison to my peers, because my shopping options were M&S and Long Tall Sally, rather than high street shops and cool indie shops. When I found a pair of black trousers or a cute dress in my size, the temptation to buy multiples was strong, because I didn't know when I'd have access to a well-fitting basic again.
But, at the same time, buying multiples felt like... a confirmation I didn't want that I was planning to stay the size I was. In a world that had already thoroughly taught me that my current body should not be my future body, I was just as likely to buy something that didn't fit me - some aspirational piece that would hang on my wardrobe - as I was to buy something that did fit me. And so I fell into a classic Fat Girl Scarcity loop - too much (clothing vac packed and unwearable, in various past and potential future sizes) and not enough (reasonable and accessible choices of clothing in the size I actually was).
For me, ASOS was the gamechanger. I suddenly had access to a range of clothes in various styles and they were even frickin' fashionable! That wasn't a feeling I experienced until I was in my 20s, and oh my I'm so glad that l'il baby fats get that feeling so much earlier on! Alongside that, I decluttered all those clothes that didn't fit (if you haven't done this yet and would like to, this article from Virgie Tovar on cleaning out her closet offers real solidarity and understanding as you go through this process), committed to respecting the body I was in, and dreamed fat futures for myself.
From where we were to where we are now, it's a different world. And yet we still have so far to go. Options are still super limited, and it's still not always easy to find clothes (what does it feel like to shop in a store and try things on before buying? I truly have no idea). Extended sizing often still feels like an optional add on, and access can sometimes feel precarious, on the whim of a brand to include or not include us, as they see fit). And I speak with the privilege of having a mid-fat body that usually gets included in additional sizing - for those in super fat and infinifat bodies, changes are reduced further still. Yes, we have a way way way to go.Â
I would love to see allies sending regular emails to their problematic faves (those that don't offer a good size range) and asking when they plan to extend sizes. I would love to see businesses recognise 'extended' sizes just as core sizes to offer. We need to see more size diversity in high street stores so people could actually try on items before buying. And I would love to see influencers and advertising include the size range for ALL the clothes that are featured, because a/ that would highlight how few things are made with a decent size range and b/ avoid a lot of disappointment for fat folks who click on links for items they would like and find, oh yea, it's not for me.Â
But over time I have a list of slow businesses I love with extended sizes, some online stores where I can buy basics, and ways of navigating second hand sites like eBay and Vinted that help me to connect with second hand clothes in my size - in fact, 30% of my buys in 2022 were second hand! And because I am long committed to loving the body I have, I can even save and spend on slightly pricier pieces, because I know I'm keeping the body I have, ta very much. If you're still collating that list for yourself, I noticed The Abby Bible has collated this list of brands, including size ranges.
Fashion and style is a twisting road for someone who grew up in a fat body, and seeing someone with a body like mine who demonstrates different styles and fits is still super helpful for me. I've discovered some really great brands through Lydia, and their personal style really resonates with me and opens me up to new potentials. Very very cool, very inspiring, and I really hope you enjoy their content.
If you missed it last week, do take a listen to the podcast episode that I recorded with Sophia Apostol on her Fat Joy podcast. I'm really proud of the joyful, rebellious, loving conversation that we had, all related to my most precious focus, Making It Safe To Be Fat. I'm really grateful to Sophia for facilitating such a warm and nurturing convo, and I hope you'll take a listen to this resource.